how can you heal a broken heart, an unenthusiastic spirit, a lack of faith?

(the thoughts and ideas was an attempt to respond to a question posted as a status bar on facebook by a friend... just thought of answering... hahaha)

these are questions often asked by a lot of people in their own unique and perfectly imperfect life journey...

but i guess, the process of finding the answers to these "wounds" is part of the healing process... the PROCESS of getting the answers could be the answer itself.

the journey to healing a broken heart can be perceived in so many ways, others would say "forgive and forget" while others, "yes, i can forgive, but I will not forget, it is best to remember the lessons learned from whatever experience". As movies would mention, "matibay ang puso". I would like to believe in that. That even if a heart is broken, it can love. That no matter how wounded a heart is, it can find ways to multiply love. No matter how little the experience one has of love, the heart can teach the person to love. Yet, when it gets broken, no matter how the mind teaches the heart to heal, i believe that it will heal and forgive and be whole again in its own good time, at its own pace. So yes, nurture the heart, nurture one's heart. How? Do not forget to love oneself a bit more everyday. As we love others, let us also love ourselves by respecting ourselves and acknowledging our dignity as persons and that there is Someone greater than us who loves us and will always do even if the world has turned it's back on us. Let such love SUSTAIN us.

When the spirit weakens, most likely, the body can weaken. When the spirit loses direction, the body may function but without passion, without focus, without clarity. Without a sound spirit, the body is just a mere container that functions physically, but within, there is just a void that exists, and empty space. How do you revive an unsound spirit? How do you wake a sleeping spirit? How do you calm restless spirits? I do not know, really! But i personally believe that when a spirit is restless, let it find rest. PAUSE. And when a spirit is drowning and fading away, start a spark and make it new.
The pause is important. That necessary STOP will allow oneself to get back to his spirit. I remember a story shared in the past, and one of lines in the story said, "let us allow our spirits to catch up with our bodies". Maybe we have moved too fast. Maybe we have done so much, maybe we wanted a lot that everything ends up being tossed up and scattered. The PAUSE you make, in whatever form will allow your body to catch up, to be one again with your spirit.

A lack of faith? This is a toughie! But whenever I could not understand what FAITH calls for, whenever I could not comprehend what it means to see things with the eyes of faith, I go back to what I learned in the past, by breaking down faith into three other concepts: believing, trusting and obeying. I guess one needs to go through the experience of believing, in whatever it may be and to be believed as well. For one who has lost faith, one must understand and experience what it means to trust and be trusted as well. And to be capped off with the experience of obeying and to be obeyed. With the concrete experience of believing, trusting and obeying, may it be from the simplest to the most complex experiences of it, one would again rediscover the virtue of faith

Reflections on my Trip to Mt. Banahaw



Around this same time last year, I had the opportunity to climb Mt. Banahaw for the very first time. They said it was a mystical mountain, where miracles could happen, and I personally believe that it's a place where answers are revealed. By I do not recall my first journey as a mystical one. I remember it as one so heavy and so tiring.

Just yesterday, I had the chance to revisit Banahaw. This time, I was ready. I knew what was in store for me and this time, I could say, I survived it with a smile.

It's almost a year since I last visited Mt. Banahaw. In this second visit, we just went through some spots in the first complex (Sta. Lucia) of the mountain.

I will always remember the journey through Husgado (cave) and the climb up to the Kalbaryo. I am thankful to the company of good friends who were there with me in this year's journey. The presence of these people made all the difference.

Some lessons I learned this year:

1.The people you journey with matter.

As I just mentioned above, the people you choose to journey with, the people who come your way, the people who merely stop by can make and break one's journey. For this adventure, they were the blessings sent from above. Their mere presence made the journey lighter, more fun and more exciting. Their voices, their stories, their laughter, all these made each step, each scratch, each moment worth it.

I remember getting stuck in a certain angle inside the Husgado cave. Looking back at last year, I entered and went out with the sad attitude of just 'getting through the cave and wanting all of it end the soonest'. This time, I went through the cave without much apprehension, but with still with certain doubts and yet a joyful anticipation. But having my friends there made it better. You can hear them watching, looking out, looking back. They made sure I got through. They told me to relax when I was about to panic, they did not leave me. Their presence gave a certain warmth to the cold and dark cave. And for all those, I would always be grateful.

2.Look ahead and look back.

As we go on our ways, it is important to see where we are headed. There are moments when you just have to see the road ahead of you. But don't forget to look back. Don't forget where you have been. Once in a while take a look at what you have gone through, so when and if you head that way again, you will definitely know what to do. Remember the step if you can, or remember the feeling brought about by that step.

3.Once in a while, take a pause. Enjoy where you are.

If making one step after another tires you too much, it's ok. Persevere in making each step. Motivate oneself as you go through your journey. Don't give up too quickly. But, when you feel that it's time to pause. Go ahead. As you pause, you can look back, and look ahead and you will see where you are. You can stop and smell the flowers, you can stop and enjoy the view. But just be mindful when you stop. There may be some behind you who need some space to over take and there may be those coming your way that may require you to step a side for them to pass through. But still, enjoy that pause. You would need that rest time to move on and move forward with your journey.

4. God walked the earth for sinners like me. I will be a bit spiritual in this item. They say that in going through the Husgado, one's sinfulness can be weighed by the number of bruises and scratches one gets after getting out and through the cave. They also say that going up the Kalbaryo is like journeying with Christ on His Way to the Cross. After going through that, (and yes, I ended up with lots of scratches), and after climbing up and reaching the top and seeing the three crosses, it hits me, “ang Diyos ay pumasaatin sa lupa para sa kagaya kong makasalanan (God walked the earth for sinners like me)”. And aren't we just blessed that He did walk the earth just like us and for us. If He got through Calvary and lived again, so could we.

5.Sometimes you just have to take that plunge. Embrace and seize the moment and let it unfold. My last stop for this journey was at the falls where the river flowed and the falls of Buhok ng Ina and Balbas ng Ama were to be found. The water was cold, yes. Icy cold! Haha! But, I wouldn't want to miss the chance to be in that cold mystical healing water. After preparing myself a bit and getting used to the cold water. I just went in and out and soaked my whole body under the cool flowing waters of Banahaw. And I ended that with going under the falls and allowing the water to cover me and I just stood there hearing the water hit the rocks and allowed it splash and to embrace me. Being under the falls was a taste of heaven here on earth. With that, I get to think that sometimes you just do things. Sometimes we are entitled to simply let go and let the world unfold. Wonderful!

So if you ask me if the climb was tiring, if it was challenging, if it took a lot of physical strength from the person, my answers to all these would be yes. But each drop of sweat lost, each scratch inflicted, each step made was worth it. Each encounter was a moment for reflection, a moment for revelation.

If my first trip to Banahaw allowed me to see the worst I could be, this second trip allowed me to see the other side of that. It allowed me to see that “I could”. It allowed me to say “I made it, I survived” and this time, with a smile.

it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

just a couple more weeks and it's Christmas.

today, i am tasked to put up the decorations inside and outside the house.
yesterday, i had the chance to spend time in one of the malls near my place. and you can smell the scent of christmas in the air... in the past, i would get a bit sad whenever i would hear both happy and sad christmas tunes being played.

yesterday, it was different. there was a certain joy, an excitement, a joyful anticipation for something. something is coming. something bigger, something better, something brighter.

indeed, it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

after having that good feeling inside me, i went to the toys section of the store. and i was thinking... this is heaven for children... indeed, Christmas is for children... do you remember what you wanted for christmas when you were a kid? i don't... but what i remember is the fascination i have had when all the lights were up and all the christmas decors were brought out of the boxes... we had christmas polar bears as white as snow, one even had a red heart with a bulb in it that lit up each time it was pressed. it also served as button so a christmas tune would play as the bulb lit up. we had papier mache figures of choirboys placed on the clavinova...and of course, we put up the christmas tree... and strategically set up the images for the Nativity scene, which gave me a different feeling each time i looked at it.

let everyday be a lot like Christmas...

we wont stay as children forever... at a certain point, we all have to grow up.. we should grow up... but let us not lose the child within us, let us not lose the little boy or little girl in our hearts.. seeing things with the eyes of a child, feeling things with the heart of a child will allow us to go back to the core of who we are and share the gift of who we are to those we encounter...

may our Christmas go beyond the toys and fancy decors, may our Christmas be a Christmas of presence, a journey of joy, a gift of love =)

oranges and pears

Step 1. making the blog.
Special thanks to my good friend gelle for convincing me to get into my writing mood and start on this blog. More tweaking has to be done. But will get there. Haha!

oranges and pears is a page for me to talk and share about the many oranges and pears in my life... haha.

Oranges, a representation of things I do not like. I must admit, as much as I want to be a compassionate individual, an understanding fellow, a gentleman who tries to see things with the eyes of faith, there are times that such task could be so challenging. Why oranges? I do not like oranges that much! hahahaha! But eventually, I have learned to appreciate oranges and once in a while enjoy that sometimes sweet sometimes sour citrus fruit.

Pears. I adore pears. One of God's best creations. hahahaha! Pears would be a representation of the things I like, the experiences I treasure, the people I cherish and some thoughts, words, expressions that have struck me in one way or another.

oranges and pears will be a window to who i am.
this too will be my world in this patch of cyberspace.

feel free to visit anytime =)